In the News

Women Running for Office Face Bias – Again

Women face biasWith so many women running for office (and winning), gender biases get lost among the tirade of political attacks. In the days following the 2018 election, more than 2,000 women were sworn into America’s state legislatures. 2,133 to be exact. Women also currently hold 25 seats in the U.S. Senate, and 101 seats in the House. And we’re just getting started. Whether eyeing the school board, mayor, state legislature, or the highest office in the land, women nationwide are planning – or running – their campaigns and lining up their support, including the five women seeking the Democratic Party’s 2020 nomination.

Despite making the decision to run, putting the issues on the front burner, and often putting their lives on the back, women are once again dealing with gender bias and facing issues surrounding likeability and voter perception on the campaign trail. And this time it’s being further amplified via social media. A new study released by The Wilson Center’s Lucina di Meco, #She Persisted: Women, Politics and Power in the New Media World, found that while male and female candidates received a similar volume of attention on social media, “the nature of the coverage, however, revealed significant differences and systematic patterns along gender lines, with female candidates receiving more attacks from right-wing and fake-news accounts than male politicians.”

The study also found that female candidates are dealing with more negative social media coverage overall than their male counterparts, with tweets more concerned about a woman’s character rather than her policy stance. “Traditional media remains mostly an obstacle for women’s political ambitions, as the coverage women in politics receive is still heavily biased against them, both in quantity and in quality, and this has a negative impact on women’s political ambitions, viability as candidates and ultimately on societal expectations of women and power.”

Women who step out to lead face  a modern twist from these attacks. . It’s a fact that all women in the public eye draw criticism and commentary, not just for their politics and policies, but also for their appearance, their parenting, their partners, their careers…the list goes on.

Take the case of Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. While she pulled off an incredible political achievement – waging an effective campaign to win a seat in the House – during her campaign, critics were quick to critique her words and question whether she should have a voice in the public debate at all. Vox reported on a tweet about her by the often-quoted voice of the Washington establishment Norm Ornstein: “This is a person not ready for prime time, certainly not ready for Congress. She should stop campaigning & do a crash course on basics, including economics and foreign policy. Otherwise, she will stumble badly out of the blocks and do major damage. Early impressions hard to erase.”

Whether online or off, gender bias is alive and well in politics, and the women running (and serving) now know it and face it every day. As we gear up for another election season, we have to call out the comments that seek to undermine women, name them as biases and talk about them. To help more women step into leadership roles, we need to encourage them, counteract the public ridicule they often face, and offer them our support for their courage and willingness to work hard to solve the issues that can make the world a better place for all of us.

$1 Billion to Expand Women’s Power and Influence to Reach Gender Equality

Women helping womenLast week Melinda Gates took a giant step forward in her work to accelerate gender equality in the U.S. and pledged $1 billion to expand women’s power and influence over the next decade. “Equality can’t wait, and no one in a position to act should either,” Gates wrote in an op-ed for Time magazine, while announcing her commitment to help women claim their power.

She will do the work through Pivotal Ventures, an investment and incubation company working to drive social progress for women and families that she founded in 2015. “This announcement is not a departure for Melinda—it’s the latest chapter in her long-standing commitment to gender equality,” a spokesperson at Pivotal Ventures told Penta.

Gates, like many of us, feels like the time to act is now. A window of opportunity has opened, or as she writes, “More accurately, it was painstakingly pried open by the hundreds of thousands of people who have joined marches across the country, the millions of women who summoned the courage to tell their #MeToo stories, the record number of women who ran for office in 2018 and won.”

History shows that we are all in a position to act. As we wrote in In This Together, “for more than 200 years, women have organized, fought, campaigned, sacrificed, and supported each other to gain the rights to inherit property, to keep their children, get an education, pursue a career, vote, hold office, and the list goes on. Although they often received no credit, women whose intersecting identities left them marginalized with less privilege have nonetheless continued to lead the movements for women’s equality. It’s time to follow their lead. It’s time to exercise all those hard-won rights to achieve true equality now.”

As Gates recently wrote in Harvard Business Review, “The unprecedented energy and attention around gender equality makes this a moment when extraordinary progress is possible — and bold, ambitious goals are appropriate. We shortchange women if we set our sights too low.”

On post-inauguration Saturday in 2017, 4.6 million women and their male allies took to the streets in 642 cities on every continent on the globe and demonstrated for women’s rights. Hundreds of thousands of women continue to march and make their voices heard. Women are speaking out against their abusers and changing the dynamics of the workplace. And record numbers of women are running for – and winning – elected offices at every level.

We are making progress, albeit slowly at times. It’s important to keep in mind that every  act to support another woman counts, and together we can accelerate the pace.  Gates advises, “In order to seize this opportunity, we have to define our goals thoughtfully.”

Her goal is, “to expand women’spower and influence in society.” She added that she thinks of power and influence “as the ability to make decisions, control resources, and shape perspectives. It is something women exercise in their homes, in their workplaces, and in their communities.” Recognizing that “power and influence” are not words historically associated with women, nor that most women associate with themselves, overcoming gender bias to claim this power and influence is a step we must all make to create change now.

While we need philanthropists, like Melinda Gates, venture capitalists, businesses, and policy makers willing to invest in gender-focused intervention, we also need women on the ground working every day to lift one another up. We can all set our personal goal to accelerate gender equality within our own center of power and influence.

We each need to stand by the woman sharing her story, to support the woman running for office, help our neighbor who is struggling, and mentor the new woman in the workplace. As Gates says, it isn’t just grand gestures that got us to this point, it was daily acts of courage, too. And it still is. We all win when we lift others up as we go.

So ask yourself — how can you make your voice be heard? What thoughtful goal can you set to help women get their fair and equal share? How can you be courageous today and use your personal power and influence to support another woman?

Closing the Gender Pay Gap – Black Women’s Equal Pay Day

Nothing says we need to close the gender pay gap more than noting Black Women’s Equal Pay Day. It’s August 22. That’s the day that black women “catch up” to what a white, non-Hispanic man made last year. That is 8 months and 22 days of extra work. It’s hard to take companies seriously when they say they realize they need to change and claim they have a high commitment to gender diversity. Women know for a fact, that it hasn’t budged in decades, not for white women either, who celebrated their equal pay day April 2. But compound this unfair imbalance for women of color with the fact that 80% of black women are the primary or sole provider of their family and it becomes an economic shortfall that affects entire communities.

Felicia Davis, Founder of the Black Women’s Collective, set about to right this obvious wrong when she turned her focus to Black Women’s Equal Pay Day last year, and held an evening mixer, “Strategize Your Way to Equal Pay” to help Phoenix area women close the gap and move into leadership positions. The mixer was such a success, that she immediately began working to make it an annual event.

“It was amazing, but we needed more time,” Felicia said. “This year we’ve got a full day of speakers, Power Talks, a Power Panel, Power Table Connections, and Power Connections.”

The 2019 “Strategize Your Way to Equal Pay” Symposium is a one-day empowerment experience for corporate and entrepreneurialblack women leaders, uniquely designed to help them amplify their vision, voice and visibility, and get paid what they’re worth. The day promises to disrupt any patterns of mediocre thinking, and attendees will be guided to breakthrough results in the areas of communication, negotiation, relationships, branding and wealth creation.

With more than a dozen recognized experts set to present, Davis says that this year’s symposium is limited to 50 attendees, so it remains small and intimate, and attendees can make high-quality connections to get the most benefits from the event.

“It’s our #BlackGirlMagic that has us be known as the most educated and most ambitious women with the strongest work ethic,” Felicia said. “While that’s great, it also becomes our blind-spot because workingincredibly hard is not enough to catalyze our leadership in a way that gets us recognized, respected and paid well.”

Felicia brings her expertise to the event and is slated to be one of the Symposium’s speakers. As an award-winning and certified leadership and personal branding strategist, author and advisor to women leaders, she also brings 20+ years of experience as a former HR executive, hard work ethic, and research to the event. Named as a “Woman of Excellence” by the National Council of Negro Women, Felicia has personally worked with hundreds of women using her proprietary branding process to help them develop compelling communication and leadership skills that position them to be recognized, remembered and recommended for high visibility projects.

Felicia says that the Symposium is, “Equal parts Heart and Strategy because you need both to thrive and succeed as a results-driven, Black Female Leader who also gets paid well.”

As part of our mission to facilitate networking among smart, amazing women devoted to changing the world, Women Connect4Good is excited to sponsor this event, and help Felicia elevate black women leaders throughout the Phoenix area. To learn more, go to www.BlackWomensCollective.com/Elevate and find out how you can help close the gender pay gap.

Know Your Worth to Negotiate the Salary You Deserve

Know Your Worth to Negotiate the Salary You DeserveTo close the gender pay gap women must know and use their worth to negotiate the salary they deserve from the organization they work for. This week, the world champion U.S. Women’s Soccer team’s win shines a glaring spotlight on wage inequality as their struggles for equal pay are well known. An ongoing lawsuit filed against the USSF by 28 members of the team notes that if the men’s and women’s teams won each of the 20 non-tournament games they are contractually required to play, women’s team players would earn a maximum of $99,000, while men’s team players would earn $263,320—that’s only 37.6% of what the men agreed to for the same performance—or 37 cents on the dollar.

The Women’s National Team Player’s Association has proposed a revenue-sharing model that would tie player compensation to revenue generated by the women’s national team for USSF. Showing solidarity for their female counterparts, the men’s national team has issued a statement of support for the women’s team lawsuit against the USSF and for this revenue-sharing model.

Throughout their salary negotiations, the soccer players have used their national platform to make their voices and demands heard. However, the most important thing about their actions is that they know their worth and set a role model standard for all women to follow and benefit from.

Women face unique challenges when it comes to salary negotiations, and as the New York Times reports, it begins with the fact that women are often viewed as “unlikeable” when they do it. Women have been socialized to avoid assertiveness, which is an essential quality when it comes to negotiation, and also consistently underestimate their professional value. That being said, it’s important to keep in mind that women won’t necessarily get what they’re worth, unless they ask for it.

Leadership expert Dr. Marissa L Weaver, Your Leadership Trainer, LLC, is one of the many women working to give women the tools they need to know their worth and negotiate a fair salary. Marissa volunteers through Tri Delta, who in collaboration with the American Association of University Women (AAUW), has launched a national initiative to teach women at 20 colleges and universities how to negotiate their salaries and benefits packages with confidence.

AAUW’s research on the gender pay gap shows that, one year out of college, women are already paid significantly less than men — in 2009, women one year out of college who were working full time were paid, on average, just 82 percent of what their male peers were paid. And those lost potential earnings add up over a lifetime. AAUW Start Smart is specifically designed to teach college age women how to negotiate salaries for a new job. In every two-hour workshop attendees will gain confidence in their negotiation style through facilitated discussion and role-play.

“We get so far behind because we start so far behind,” Marissa said. “From a college woman’s perspective, they don’t know they are supposed to negotiate. Employers are expecting it, but women are afraid to ask.”

The work AAUW is doing to help women negotiate their salary and benefit packages doesn’t end with college age women, the organization’s programming also includes Work Smart, designed to help women in the workforce negotiate a new job, raise, or promotion. Both programs look at:

  • How to identify and articulate your personal value
  • How to develop an arsenal of persuasive responses and other negotiation strategies, including how to get a raise or promotion
  • How to conduct objective market research to benchmark a target salary and benefits
  • How the wage gap affects you, including its long-term consequences

Through these workshops, AAUW reports that women are better positioned for success. “Women who negotiate increase their potential to earn higher salaries and better benefits packages. By negotiating fair and equitable salaries, you’ll be better able to pay off loans, buy the things you want and need, and even save for retirement.”

Weaver has had her own experiences since launching her career and was lowballed early on. “My employer expected me to counter. I didn’t because I didn’t know I could. Luckily I was given a raise after a year to help.”

“You can’t be afraid to ask for what you’re worth, and what you want.” Marissa added. “Most of the time you’ll get something – a perk, a benefit, or money – you just have to ask. The first time you do it, it’s so scary, but once you do it, it’s so much easier.”

Ultimately, we have the power to change the status quo and close the pay gap, all we have to do is simply ask. We’re in this together, and by knowing our worth and using it as a tool to ask for the salary and benefits we need and deserve, we can change the workplace, our homes, our communities, and increase our perceived value to ourselves and to the world.

Order Your Copy of Dr. Nancy’s New Book Today!

Navigating negotiations and closing the pay gap are just a couple of the issues covered in Dr. Nancy’s new book, In This Together: How Successful Women Support Each Other In Work and Life, along with thoughts, inspiration, and stories from 40 successful women.

Order your copy – and gifts for your friends today! After you’ve read it, please, leave us a 5-star review on Amazon. Your review will help us reach more women with proven techniques for achieving gender equality by working with other women and our male allies.

Gender Equality Starts with a Conversation

gender equalityIn order to create gender equality in the workplace, women and men, need to start a conversation to share ideas from our diverse perspectives. By doing so, we can build an environment where every person – regardless of gender – is valued, respected, and equally compensated. It isn’t as easy as making a wish, we’re going to have to recognize where we are now, and develop strategies and work together to move forward from here.

In the new book, In This Together, we point to studies done by Catalyst, Fairygodboss, and others that show men’s perspectives about equality in the workplace differ from women’s. Women see the need for more women leaders, family-friendly schedules, and equal pay. Men, not so much. Men are not conscious of the discrepancy, so they don’t even see it. We all need to get on the same page together before we can write the next chapter. Don’t assume that anyone, especially men, will understand what it’s like to walk in your shoes unless you teach them what it’s like to be a woman in your workplace.

Building a case for our male counterparts to join us in our efforts isn’t one-sided, equality benefits us all. For example, McKinsey & Company found that companies with more balanced leadership do a better job recruiting and retaining talented workers, which leads to reduced costs for replacing top executives.  Gender equality can also:

  • Increase profits–as evidenced by a 2007 Catalyst report that finds Fortune 500 companies with the highest representation of women board directors achieved markedly better results.
  • Increase revenue–as MIT researchers also found that a more even gender split not only leads to happier, more productive employees, but it can also increase revenue by 41 percent.

The Institute for Gender Partnership, founded by podcast guest Rayona Sharpnack, who serves at the organization’s CEO,  teaches organizations how to master “Gender Partnership” so that they are able to effectively understand, connect, and communicate with 100% of customers, end-users, and stakeholders — AND fully able to attract, retain and develop 100% of the available talent pool. Through targeted leadership services and training programs, men and women are taught to learn from and leverage one another’s special skills and talents, listen to one another’s ideas, and to have patience with each other’s individual styles. It’s through this process that the Institute has found a team’s creativity, productivity, and decision-making are no longer hobbled by miscommunication, misunderstandings, or unconscious bias.

To bring your male allies on board, you can start small. As we write in In This Together, you can simply reassure your ally that you are neither holding him responsible nor expecting him to solve women’s problems; you only want him to become more aware. Communicate with your ally about your needs and goals and discuss biases, assumptions, and oppressive patterns of behavior that you observe at work.

From there you can think together strategically about how to address any issues that are inhibiting your ability to do your work, achieve your goals, and thrive in your relationships with your coworkers. Ultimately, open communication about these issues lets women and their allies develop positive working relationships based on their shared values. Communication will also create opportunities for collaboration among peers. From the outset women and their allies can agree to work together, share in the rewards of success, and give credit where credit is due.

Bottom line, gender equality starts with a conversation and looking for ways we can work together and achieve our goals. We need to highlight the thousands of ways we all win when we achieve equality and build the case to bring our male allies on board. Men are part of the solution, and when we work with them, we can change the workplace and the world together.

Order Dr. Nancy’s New Book Today!

Dealing with sexism and cultivating men as allies are just a couple of the issues covered in Dr. Nancy’s new book, In This Together: How Successful Women Support Each Other In Work and Life, along with thoughts, inspiration, and stories from 40 successful women.

Order your copy – and gifts for your friends today! After you’ve read it, please, leave us a 5-star review on Amazon. Your review will help us reach more women with proven techniques for achieving gender equality by working with other women and our male allies.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Make Men an Equal Part of the Equality Solution

Part of the SolutionFor women to be equal to men, we must think equal, which means we need to engage our male allies, and make them an equal part of the equality solution. Unfortunately, eighteen months after the rise of the #MeToo movement, a new study by LeanIn.org has found that 60 percent of male managers said they are uncomfortable interacting with women at work and are afraid to have a one-on-one meetings – up 32 percent from 2018. Senior men who were surveyed are also nine times more likely to avoid traveling with a woman and six times more likely to hesitate to have a work dinner.

This is not good. Overwhelmingly men still hold positions of power at work, and this lack of access and potential mentorship can have devastating consequences on a woman’s career trajectory and gender equality as a whole. Rachel Thomas, president of LeanIn.org said that, “If men want to be part of the solution, then pulling away from women is the wrong thing to do.”

Sheryl Sandberg, Lean In’s founder and Facebook’s chief operating officer, recently said on CBS This Morning, “How do you get promoted without a one-on-one meeting?” You don’t. No one does.

“If there’s a man out there who doesn’t want to have a work dinner with a woman, my message is simple: Don’t have one with a man. Group lunches for everyone. Make it explicit, make it thoughtful, make it equal,” Sandberg said. “Men need to step up. We need to redefine what it means to be a good guy at work. It’s not enough to not harass, and I think too many people think that’s sufficient. That’s necessary, that’s a basic, but it’s not sufficient.”

With so few women in the C-suite and upper management, many women say their best mentors and allies have been men. As we wrote in the new book, In This Together, women employed in majority-male workplaces are already more likely to say that their gender has made it harder for them to get ahead at work. They are also less likely to say that women there are treated fairly in personnel matters, and they report experiencing gender discrimination at significantly higher rates. Disappointingly, nearly a third of women who work in mostly female workplaces say the same. These new findings, and increasing lack of access, makes a bad situation worse.

While women are leading the charge in the fight for equality at work, we cannot achieve parity without the support of men allies. All efforts to involve men in eliminating gender inequality, from historical women’s struggles, like suffrage, to sticking their necks out to support women at work today, hinges on one single strategy: communication, but we can’t communicate if we can’t get a meeting.

Catalyst reported that men’s support for gender equality can be engaged by appealing to their sense of fairness. In addition, shifting away from a win-or-lose mentality to recognizing that everyone benefits from gender equality can lead men to become greater advocates who endorse our efforts to change unfair practices.

We need equal access. We need to communicate our needs and goals and discuss ways to overcome gender bias, assumptions, and oppressive patterns of behavior at work. We need to point out the negative consequences of a lack of access and explain the ways that withdrawal severely limits women’s opportunities for advancement. Most of all, we need to highlight the thousands of ways we all win (men and women) when we achieve equality. Let’s not shy away from the steps we need to take to achieve gender equality in the workplace. The first step needs to be making men allies and an equal part of the solution. Let’s work together to make parity the norm.

Order Dr. Nancy’s New Book Today!

Dealing with sexism and cultivating men as allies are just a couple of the issues covered in Dr. Nancy’s new book, In This Together: How Successful Women Support Each Other In Work and Life, along with thoughts, inspiration, and stories from 40 successful women.

Order your copy – and gifts for your friends today!

 

Is Overwork Creating the Gender Pay Gap?

Is Overwork Creating the Gender Pay Gap?Today in the United States, the gender lens is focusing on new reasons for the continued gender pay gap, especially as women in the workplace continue to face the biggest gaps in leadership and pay, while being more educated than ever before. As we report in the new book, In This Together, the US gender wage gap is below 20 percent for women overall, although that doesn’t apply equally to women of color. In general, Latina women still have the biggest wage gap compared to white men (nearly 38 percent), then African-American women (32 percent), then white women (18 percent), and Asian women have the smallest gap (7 percent). Although companies say they realize they need to change and claim that their commitment to gender diversity is high, the gender wage gap and number of women in leadership has barely budged in decades.

While we could look at the varied causes of the gap and examine things like gender bias or a lack of family-friendly policies, two articles recently came out that point to something else entirely.

The New York Times reported on mounting evidence that has led economists and sociologists to look at the wage gap in a way that has nothing to do with gender and identify a major driver – the return to working long, inflexible hours. “The return to seemingly endless work weeks has increased dramatically and is a side effect of the nation’s embrace of a winner-take-all economy. This is especially true in what social scientists call ’greedy professions’ like managerial work, law, finance and consulting. The impact of this shift is so powerful, it has canceled the effect of women’s educational gains.”

It is important to note that there is no gender gap in the financial rewards for working long hours, and for the most part, women who work an extreme schedule get paid as much as men do. But far fewer women do it, particularly mothers. Youngjoo Cha at Indiana University, Kim Weeden at Cornel find that twenty percent of fathers now work at least 50 hours a week, whereas just six percent of mothers do.

The Atlantic also looked at overwork and further reported on the recently published research by Youngjoo Cha, who finds that the pressure to work more than 50 hours a week pushes working mothers out of what we think of as male-dominated professions. Using the Census’ longitudinal Survey of Income and Program Participation, Cha found a significant correlation between male-dominated professions and their tendency to have average working hours of more than 50 hours a week.

Cha blames gender biases about work that haven’t evolved much in the last few decades. “When people are really expected to dive into the workplace and have a complete devotion to work, that was probably possible because there was someone else who can do other things for that person,” Cha says. “This overwork norm is basically built upon those assumptions.”

A recent report published by the Center for American Progress says that, “Even the most fortunate—the better-educated and better-off professionals who tend to have access to paid leave, flexibility, sick days, and decent child care—find balancing the necessary demands of work and home an increasingly fraught and anxious-making endeavor in our era of “extreme jobs” and 24/7 availability.”

The report also finds that nearly three-quarters of Americans now say that they, their neighbors, and their friends experience hardship in balancing work, family, and professional responsibilities at least somewhat often, and nearly 40 percent say that they experience such conflict “all the time” or “very often.”

This tendency towards overwork, and the status that comes with it indicates that the gap is not just about women opting out to take care of family responsibilities, this is also about a fundamental shift in the nature of work. However, simply recognizing the problem is not enough, researchers say that workers have to demand change. As it sits right now, companies are reaping the rewards of having always-on workers and won’t make the needed changes just to be kind. They have to run the risk of losing top talent if they don’t – and that includes men.

When women are the only ones who switch to jobs with predictable hours or take advantage of flexibility, it hurts their careers. We need to change the status quo and work for policies that work for women and families, not against them. Millennial men aren’t buying in to this “always-on” approach and researchers find that they want more equal partnerships, and more involvement in family life. We need to engage them, and their older counterparts, to come together and work with us for gender-neutral policies that benefit everyone equally. We can change this overwork trend and close the gap if we address the problem together.

 

Order Dr. Nancy’s New Book Today!

Cultivating men as allies and working with them to achieve equality are just some of the topics covered in Dr. Nancy’s new book, In This Together: How Successful Women Support Each Other In Work and Life, along with thoughts, inspiration, and stories from 40 successful women.

Order your copy – and gifts for your friends today!

The #MeToo Movement Continues to Have an Impact

In the fall of 2017, actress Alyssa Milano responded to published sexual harassment and assault allegations against Harvey Weinstein with a Twitter hashtag that simply said, “#MeToo.” The hashtag quickly went viral and the next day, 609,000 posts followed suit according to Meltwater, which tracks social media impact. What started out as a Tweet quickly became a movement and within a year prominent people across a number of industries were publicly accused of sexual misconduct. The movement exposed a laundry list of accusations against men in powerful positions in media, Hollywood, tech and more. Before long women in every industry and from every country began calling out their assailants, saying, “Enough.” Women no longer felt isolated, and it became clear that these high-profile stories were just the tip of the iceberg. In fact, behind the headlines, hundreds of women and men — in industries across the board – filed their own harassment complaints, called hotlines, and came forward with their stories.

The impact of #MeToo has been undeniable and has not only led to the downfall of powerful people, but also an incredible impact on the workplace. The U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission saw about 7,500 harassment complaints filed from October 2017 to September 2018, a 12 percent increase compared to the previous year.

The fight against harassment got a boost from #TimesUp and the National Women’s Law Center. The two groups launched a legal defense fund to provide low-income women with attorney consultations and help with legal fees. According to Emily Martin, a vice president of the National Women’s Law Center, the fund has raised $22 million in donations and assisted 3,500 women and men from all 50 states.

#MeToo Started Long Before the Tweet

Tarana Burke began using #MeToo 11 years before Milano took to Twitter as a way to empower survivors of sexual assault, and the two women actually ended up working together to turn #MeToo into a global phenomenon. Now, Burke has officially established the Me Too Movement as an organization that will  continue to have an impact, whether the hashtag is trending or not.

According to an interview with Business Insider, Burke’s biggest goal this year is “fighting for narrative shift,” which she feels needs to take place with the conversations around abuse and harassment. “We’re still talking about individuals that had acted, and we’re still talking about who can come back to work or not and that kind of stuff, as opposed to talking about all the people who said, ‘Me too.’ What do they need? What are they doing right now? How is their life being affected?”

To answer these questions, Burke says she would like to see more open dialogue in workplaces, which may be easier considering the conversations that were started by the movement. It may also be easier given the number of women who have replaced the men who were forced out. Case in point, by October 2018, 201 powerful men were brought down by #MeToo, and nearly half of their replacements were women.

This dialogue is important. As we wrote in the new book, In This Together, if we are to end sexual harassment and violence, we need to understand what it is, what it is not, and how to combat it. Although most men do not rape or harass women, neither do most men feel a responsibility to stop others from doing so.

That means we need to teach men how to treat women. It is time for women to insist that men share the responsibility when it comes to stopping other men from committing assault and abuse. This is not a women’s problem. It’s a human problem, and that means that all of us need to work together for cultural change.

Sexual Harassment is Still a Real Problem

Burke wants “Me Too” not to be a divisive issue, but a common-sense one — that supports survivors of violence and creates inclusive workplaces. However, a May 2018 poll by Morning Consult shows there is a wide partisan gap in support for the #MeToo movement. By October 2018, that gap had grown.

Meredith Conroy writes that since 2016, Republicans have grown more skeptical of women who report harassment and the motivation behind their claims. However, members of both parties were more likely to acknowledge that sexual harassment of women in the workplace is a problem in the U.S. One explanation for the gap could be that attitudes about gender equality are increasingly correlated with partisan identity.

We need to focus on the fact that sexual harassment is a problem, and collaborate on finding ways to change the status quo. Partisan politics aside – this is an issue that deserves our undivided attention, and we need to work together to correct the system that pits us against each other.

When in Doubt, Speak Out

Oftentimes, women are not sure if what is happening to them actually constitutes harassment. If you are unsure, review the definition of workplace sexual harassment and ask someone you trust outside of your organization. If you or someone you know is subject to harassment, insist that other women listen and offer to help make it stop. We can only eliminate this problem if we all work together.  Let’s transform the #Metoo movement into a positive force that magnifies our respect, consideration, and kind regard for one another–all genders, races, nationalities and religions. Together, we can heal our divisions and make an impact that moves our civilization another giant step forward toward the kind of life we all want to live.

 

Order Dr. Nancy’s New Book Today!

Sexual harassment and gender equality are just a couple of the topics covered in Dr. Nancy’s new book, In This Together: How Successful Women Support Each Other In Work and Life, along with thoughts, inspiration, and stories from 40 successful women.

Order your copy – and gifts for your friends today!

 

Eliminating Sexism with the Help of Our Male Allies

It’s a fact that many men want to support women at work, stamp out sexism and help women advance. However, they may not be aware that the way they go about it may do more harm than good. David M. Mayer writes in Harvard Business Review that a well-meaning man, even one who defends a woman’s ideas or work, can unintentionally undermine her. Whether these men realize it or not, their behavior isn’t helpful, but instead is a form of benevolent sexism.

Psychologists Peter Glick and Susan Fisk define benevolent sexism as a chivalrous attitude that suggests women are weak and need men’s protection. While that may not seem like a bad thing on the surface, Glick and Fisk find, “This kind of paternalism suggest that women need to be taken care of by men, and men who endorse this form of benevolent sexism are more likely to accept the mistreatment and harassment of women at work.”

Comments that describe women as more compassionate, nurturing, neater, or kinder than men are stereotypical, and can be misconstrued. Mayer points out, “Research demonstrates that such ‘compliments’ create a double bind for women: If women are viewed as nice, they are far less likely to be deemed competent.”

Research has found benevolent sexism reduces the chances of getting candid feedback or a shot at the challenging or hot assignments. Instead women get unwanted assistance and confidence-eroding offers. This ties directly into the unintended harmful effects of benevolent sexism that we write about in the new book, In This Together. “Directing women into public relations because they are great communicators puts them at a corporate dead end. Women who are gracious and welcoming get saddled with organizing all the office events. Women who are intuitive and connect well with others are expected to manage the office’s emotional housework, including relational aggression among other women. Finally, men who refuse to travel for business with women prevent them from advancing higher in sales or management.”

A poll by Pew Research Center suggests that more than half of men think sexism is a thing of the past. When looking at issues like benevolent sexism, it’s easy to see why only about one-third of women agree. Yes, sexism is still a problem, and until we shine a light on the issue and communicate it to our peers, it will continue to hold women back.

Recruiting Men as Allies

Men: Ask the women at work to tell you about their experiences and listen to them when they talk. Don’t try to interpret their experience for them or tell them “what they ought to do.”

Women: Don’t assume that anyone, especially men, will understand what it’s like to walk in your shoes unless you teach them what it’s like to be a woman in your workplace. We need to recruit men to the cause of equality and talk about the issues. We are truly “in this together,” and it’s a mistake to limit our support networks exclusively to women. Gender equality is a big umbrella that includes and benefits men too.

Who are the men in your workplace who meet the criteria for allies? Look for a man who:

  • Can turn his good intentions into lasting change if women will tell him truthfully and openly the ways gender inequality has affected them
  • Shows through his words and actions that he is committed to gender equality
  • Is willing to have the difficult conversations on your behalf when you’re not in the room
  • Offers to mentor and sponsor women to create opportunities for female leadership within your company

Once you identify such a man, ask for his help and expect and believe that he will help you. Communicate with your ally about your needs and goals. Discuss biases, assumptions, and oppressive patterns of behavior that you observe at work. Think together strategically about how to address any issues that inhibit your ability to do your work, achieve your goals, and thrive in your relationships with your coworkers. Ultimately, opening communication about these issues enables women and their allies to develop positive working relationships based on shared values. Communication will also create opportunities for collaboration among peers. From the outset women and their allies can agree to work together, share in the rewards of success, and give credit where credit is due.

Problems like benevolent sexism didn’t arrive overnight, and they won’t disappear right away either. However, if we work together, women and men, to identify and eradicate the problem, we truly can gain full equality in work and life.

 

Order Dr. Nancy’s new book today!

Dealing with sexism and cultivating men as allies are just a couple of the issues covered in Dr. Nancy’s new book, In This Together: How Successful Women Support Each Other In Work and Life, along with thoughts, inspiration, and stories from 40 successful women.

Order your copy – and gifts for your friends today!

When It Comes to Networks, Women Need Quality Connections

Networks are key to anyone’s career advancement, but this is especially true for women, who are underrepresented at all levels of business, from first tier managers to the C-Suite. That means peers and colleagues aren’t readily available in the workplace, and a woman must step outside of her daily professional connections to find the support and quality networks that she needs.

Even though women are strong collaborators and communicators, we tend to have fewer business-related connections than our male counterparts. We also tend to divide the connections we do have into personal and professional groups, with less evident overlap than men. This presents some challenges when it comes to building or advancing our careers.

New research in Harvard Business Review by Brian Uzzi, a professor at Northwestern’s Kellogg School of Management, finds that when looking at groups of MBAs—analyzing both the makeup of the subjects’ networks and the types of jobs they found after graduation – men benefit not so much from size of network but from being central in a network, or connected to multiple “hubs,” or people who have a lot of contacts across different groups. Women also benefit from being central in a network, “but to achieve the executive positions with the highest levels of authority and pay they also had to have an inner circle of close female contacts, despite having similar qualifications to men including education and work experience.”

Uzzi concludes, “Because women seeking positions of executive leadership often face cultural and political hurdles that men typically do not, they benefit from an inner circle of close female contacts that can share private information about things like an organization’s attitudes toward female leaders, which helps strengthen women’s job search, interviewing, and negotiation strategies.”

For women it isn’t the size of the network that matters, it’s the type of connections that make a difference. Thankfully, a woman’s most formidable strength is her ability to build relationships. This is what networking is really about, not just connecting on LinkedIn, trading cards, or getting business leads. True networks are built on commonalities and trust. You can’t predict when someone you know might make a connection to help you in your career or your life, or when you might help someone else with a referral. The depth and breadth of your network also build a personal and professional safety net, and the connections themselves can bring great joy and satisfaction.

Small Networks Can Make a Big Difference

A strong network doesn’t have to be big to be effective. This is a topic addressed in the book, In This Together, where we discuss a time in Dr. Nancy’s life where she struggled with feeling a lack of support and decided to build a community of like-minded women who would support each other, and realized that when we help one another, anything is possible. “I found that community with the women I call my Psyche Sisters,” she said. “All eight of us were seasoned therapists working on our doctorates in clinical psychology. We gave each other moral, physical, and emotional support, and all eight of us received our doctorates and became licensed psychologists. We have continued for more than twenty years to meet, reflect, encourage, and celebrate who we are as women and psychologists.”

A Strong Network of Women Can Change a Community

We also share the story of Paige Oxendine and Rachel Anderson in the book, In This Together, who were united in a determination to make a difference and show what women can do. They noticed that the leadership of almost everything in their Springfield, Missouri, community could be characterized as overwhelmingly “male, pale, and stale,” and they asked, “Where are all the young women and minorities?

With a grant from the Women’s Foundation in Kansas City, they set up a women’s network, which they named Rosie, and held their launch party the week after the November 2016 presidential election. The realized they’d struck a nerve when more than 200 women showed up. Today, Rosie provides a support and advocacy system, as well as a referral pipeline for female speakers and board members. Their mission is to help connect, partner, collaborate and continue to increase the support and access to resources for women as it relates to professional development, business assistance and leadership, and they support, assist and serve as an advocate network for current and prospective female founders, business owners and leaders in the Springfield region.

Network with Purpose

To build a network that will help you through the good days and bad, and help you continue to advance, think quality over quantity. It’s less about how many people you know, and more about who those people are. Uzzi also recommends that you embrace randomness and diversify your network and inner circle.

Ultimately, you have to put your skills to work and build a network with purpose and focus on connections that can be mutually beneficial. We’re in this together, and we, as women, have a lot of momentum. As we intentionally continue to connect and support one another, we can reach our professional goals, and build a workplace that works for women and men.

Order Dr. Nancy’s new book today!

Ms. Career Girl says that, “Just as with getting clear on your goals and resolutions, you don’t have to imagine all this from scratch. Check out In This Together to see how you can develop a community of like-minded allies…there’s a ton of actionable insights from 40 successful women that will help you harness the collective power of that community.”

In This Together: How Successful Women Support Each Other In Work and Life, is filled with thoughts, advice, and stories from 40 successful women across a variety of careers—from authors to actresses, CEOs and professors—encouraging women to support each other in the workplace and in life.

Ready to learn about action plans on how all women can work together to break free from the binds of gender inequality? Order your copy – and gifts for your friends today!

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