Love

World Change Begins in Your Heart

Author, Speaker, Humanitarian

Dr. Paula Fellingham

Humanitarian and global women’s movement leader, Dr. Paula Fellingham continues to point her light toward spreading world peace and women’s empowerment for every woman on the planet. As an author of seven books, a teacher, musician, grandmother and winner of both the “Outstanding Leadership and Service” award from President Obama and the “Points of Light” award from President George W. Bush, Paula is propelling her social profit foundation, The Global Prosperity and Peace Initiative, to reach more people than any such endeavor ever has in the history of the world. Paula says each individual must see and accept peace within themselves before we can change the world. Therefore, her peace lessons begin within the heart, and she then shows how to share them in the home, and finally expand into humanity.

Target Date: International Women’s Day, March 3, 2019

Building on the landmark celebration in the 100th anniversary of International Women’s Day in 2011, Paula is collaborating with organizations all over the world to launch a program developed by women for women celebrating all we have done, and providing a platform for women to help one another around the world. Using the video conference technology of Zoom, Paula is working to  produce a program that will reach 400 Million people 36,000 live events in every nation on the planet. This massive collaboration will also be available for download on Hulu.

Become a National Peace Ambassador

Paula invites everyone listening to become a National Peace Ambassador. You can sign up on PeaceandProsperityInitiative.org. It’s free and completely volunteer. You can participate as much as you want, but she has made it easy through the peace lessons, called “Peace Is Possible” which she developed for people to give in their own home. The lessons are adaptable to every age group and address problems people have every day.
Originally developed as a program for Rotary International, Paula’s “Peace is Possible” lessons teach participants how to be kind and loving to themselves, their children, brothers, sisters, classmates. She advises how to resolve conflicts in concrete practical ways, how to combat bullying and many more daily life issues. Her focus is on prevention and letting each human being know how precious they are, focusing on the fact that everyone matters and needs to believe that about themselves and everyone they meet.
Listen to more words of wisdom and inspiring projects from these two dedicated humanitarians, Dr. Nancy and Dr. Paula. Hear true stories about how women working together are making the world a far better place to live in. Check out Paula’s website, PaulaFellingham.com, and learn more about her women’s organizations that are founded on the same principles of women helping women as WomenConnect4Good, Inc.

I Am A Superwoman

What an exciting time to be a woman! Everywhere super women are coming together to make a difference in the world. I am thrilled to announce that “I Am A Superwoman” and to add to the powerful voices you can hear at the “I Am A Superwoman” Equality & Empowerment Weekend.This amazing day-long summit and inaugural Red-Carpet Gala at the Beverly Hilton in Los Angeles both celebrates our progress and puts our combined muscle (men and women) behind the movement for the kind of culture change that will end abuse and violence toward women and children, global human trafficking and continued inequality. It’s time for women to step forward and lead this foundational shift in our culture and stimulate a re-education and recalibration of society for the sake of our children and our children’s children.

As part of my mission to support women through my foundation, WomenConnect4Good, Inc., and Take The Lead, where I now serve as President of the Board, I am honored to kick off the event with the opening keynote, and be a beacon for women to get their S on and accept personal responsibility to be agents of change at this critical time in history. The Summit is stacked with inspirational speakers and special guests who target female and male entrepreneurs, business leaders, executives and change-makers. The day will be brimming with new ideas and opportunities to brainstorm solutions and network with some of the most dynamic speakers in their field.

Get your tickets now for Friday, August 24, 2018. Basic attendance is $222. Enhanced attendance ($359) gets you a three-course lunch at the Beverly Hilton with VIPs, and the opportunity to get to know the special guests invited to share their passion and wisdom.

Step out Saturday night on the Golden Globe Red Carpet at the international ballroom of the Beverly Hilton [www.superwomancampaign.org/RedCarpetGalaTickets/] and enjoy The “I Am a Superwoman” Red Carpet Gala & Auction. It will be a night to remember! Tickets include dinner, live entertainment, red carpet glamour plus an incredible LIVE auction featuring lots of celebrity memorabilia including the late Whitney Houston’s piano. The Schimmel was her pride and joy. It was the first piano she ever owned in fact she purchased it with her first royalty check!

I am so pleased to join SHEROESUnited, founded by my amazing Leading Women co-author Bridget Cook Burch in this effort to create change on a global scale. Besides the extraordinary personal insights and inspiration, “I Am Superwoman” Empowerment and Equality Weekend, benefits organizations like SHEROESUnited, a 501c3 organization creating a “Global Movement of Women Who DARE to Change the World through Love.” Sheroes are women who have done heroic things in extraordinary circumstances and become victors, not victims.
Please accept my personal invitation to join us, be a Superwoman, a leader for change. Put your S on and meet other powerful women and men like you at the Beverly Hilton in Los Angeles. Get your tickets here. Busy that weekend? You can still join the movement. Check this post and learn how to participate via social media. And to donate directly, click here.
I sincerely hope to see you there, August 24-25. I’ll have my S on!
~Dr. Nancy

Hear Her Song Honors 20 Women

“Hear Her Song” Performers at The National Gallery of Art

Carla Canales, Founder and Director of The Canales Project recently created “Hear Her Song” to celebrate and give voice to stories of women who are changing the world for the better. I was honored to be among 20 women recognized by the Project, and was beyond humbled at the inaugural presentation on March 18 at The National Gallery of Art in Washington, D.C.

Presented in partnership with Vital Voices and my Leading Women co-author Linda Rendleman’s Women Like Us Foundation, an astounding array of songwriters, musicians, singers and artists created songs, performances and recordings to commemorate powerful insights into the nature of women’s leadership and the challenges facing women world-wide.

“Hear Her Song” audience at the National Gallery of Art

Each woman honoree was asked questions about her story to reveal critical choices she had made to overcome obstacles and realize her vision of success. Jacqueline Suskin, The Canales Project poet in residence, then took that information and composed the lyrics to each song. Melodies were then added by emerging female composers under the guidance of Musical Director Kurt Crowley, best known as the music director of the Broadway musical, Hamilton.

More performances are planned, including one scheduled for Saturday, May 19, 2018, 7:00pm at the Hammer Theatre Center in San Jose, California.

Dr. Nancy’s song:

Maggie Castrey, Dr. Nancy O’Reilly, Jen Dethro at The National Gallery of Art

Without doubt, the clarity
of purpose comes like a divine definition,
feminine form to craft a foundation
for the finest feeling.
This communal consideration
collects between hearts that nurture,
under the care of each voice considered
and always reshaping myths that block
us from betterment. In unison
we find the balance, bright bloom
of equality that brings us
into steadfast union.

~Jacqueline Suskin, Poet in Residence
~Madeline Myers, Melody

Check out The Canales Project.com for information about future performances and a complete list of the 20 women honored in the project.

“Hear Her Song” by artist Rosemary Feit Covey

Who You ARE Makes a Difference

Founder of Blue Ribbons Worldwide

Helise “Sparky” Bridges


Helice “Sparky” Bridges had it all – a big house on the Pacific Ocean, fancy cars, beautiful sons and an emotionally abusive husband – when she hit the wall. She fell to her knees and cried, “Stop the world I want to get off!” and a voice answered,” You can’t end your life because you are going to sing and dance and write.”Later on she also understood that she must also make a difference in the world. The fact that she couldn’t sing, had never danced a step or written much beyond a real estate contract didn’t stop her. She left home with a potted plant and some clothes and did those very things in spite of apparent shortcomings because of what she IS–outrageous.
Sparky realized that everyone just tries to be the best mom or dad or teacher, but what everyone really needs is to be recognized and loved, just like she did.  She created a symbolic hug in the Blue Ribbon ceremony in 1980, now called “Blue Ribbons Worldwide” with a goal of uniting humanity through the power of love and within three months 35,000 people were honored with it. Sparky’s goal is to reach one billion people by 2020. That’s one in seven people in the world, the mathematical tipping point for social change.

“Bing!” is the sound of making dreams come true.

With over 40 million people and counting, Blue Ribbons Worldwide is working hard on its goal to unite the world through the power of love. Sparky calls it the glue that’s missing from our lives. The blue ribbon she created says, “Who I Am Makes a Difference” and the ceremony requires seven steps, beginning with looking the person in the eye and honoring them for the qualities that make them special, asking permission to place the ribbon over their heart and for them to receive the honor, and finally “Bing!” to signify making their dreams come true. Each blue ribbon presented is followed by two more with a request for that person to pay it forward to two others.

Sparky tells her own story and the inspiring stories of how the Blue Ribbon Ceremony made a difference in people’s lives in her book, Who I am Makes a Difference: The Power of Acknowledgement, Stories that Connect People Heart-to-Heart and Ignite the Human Spirit. One story on how the blue ribbon prevented a teen suicide is also featured in Chicken Soup for the Soul. That is at the heart of Blue Ribbons Worldwide, to end teen suicide, heal the world by helping one person at a time understand how much she/he matters. Today more than 40 million people have been honored with blue ribbons, but 2020 is only a couple of years away.

#BLUERIBBONCHALLENGE

Sparky says that people need to have personal connections and not be in such a “doing” world, but in a “being” world, where we can see each other’s hearts and the beauty in people. She is inviting others  to join her in becoming sponsors of a new initiative to train 40,000 middle and high school students to discover who they are, why they were born and the difference they make. The students will be honoring each other, honoring their parents and writing stories about it to unite the community in supporting everyone else’s dreams. Besides reducing teen suicides, bullying and the other epidemics that are infecting our teens, Sparky says that it will elevate education in America by developing social and emotional literacy. Instead of concentrating our efforts on conflict resolution, the Blue Ribbon Ceremony will focus on elevating our relationships to a higher bond of respect and love. To learn more about Blue Ribbons Worldwide, contact Sparky directly at her e-mail: sparky@blueribbons.org.
Listen to this conversation for more inspiring stories and to hear the 7-step Blue Ribbon Acknowledgement Ceremony from Sparky to Dr. Nancy. Check out Sparky’s website and ways Blue Ribbons Worldwide is uniting the world through sharing love with 40 million people and counting.Find out how you can help make it One Billion by 2020 at Blue Ribbons Worldwide.

Generosity, Gratitude and Grace

by Dr. Nancy D. O’Reilly
For my gift to you this holiday season, I want to look closely at the three G’s: generosity, gratitude and grace. Let’s think about what those attributes mean to us and the people around us when we give these precious gifts to ourselves.
This time of year always brings out generosity in people as we rush around trying to figure out the best gifts for family and friends, and I like to think of how giving to others really affects us. Every time I reach out with feelings of generosity to help another woman, I receive far more than I ever give. I never want to take that returned gift for granted. Beyond the rewards I feel for helping someone achieve her purpose or move closer to her dream, I am convinced that each little gesture of giving back gets passed on as that person helps someone else. And they always do—always.
“Pay it forward” has become popular in our society as we pass on the payment for the next cup of coffee to the person behind us. But it has much larger connotations when you think about the energy each gesture of kindness creates as it spreads from one person to the next, and beyond your reach to others in ways that you can’t even imagine. If we remind ourselves as we move through our days that we can affect each person we meet positively or negatively, it helps us choose to be generous with our kindness, our respect and appreciation for other people. When we intentionally choose that course every minute, even when someone pulls out in front of us or makes an unkind remark, we gain the power to over-ride a knee-jerk response and remain calm, forgiving, and even grateful for the challenges we receive.
Speaking of feeling grateful–In our culture, women have trouble simply saying “thank you” and expressing gratitude. For some reason, we don’t feel that we are worthy of receiving compliments or gifts. Why we think we have to be worthy to feel grateful is beyond my understanding, but we’re programmed that way by a lifetime of self-esteem challenges in our society. When someone gives us a compliment, women are too often ready with a, “yes, but…” We need to think of the disservice to the person honoring us when we negate their compliment and instead simply feel grateful. We have to let go of our self-limiting beliefs to do this and that takes practice. We have to compliment ourselves and feel our self-worth, look in the mirror and tell ourselves how good we are, pick out the positive aspects–that kindness you showed someone who needed it, how you finally established healthy boundaries with your family, how you pulled off that negotiation at work—and practice, practice, practice.
A gratitude journal is recommended by many professionals (including me) for working yourself out of a stuck frame of mind. When you’re at a low point, thinking about what you are grateful for and writing it down opens your eyes to the many blessings in your life. Do this every day and you will quickly begin to feel grateful and positive about the future. I have long recommended it in consultation and know from personal experience that it works. I have also worked in crisis response and think it’s interesting that the most resilient people always speak about what they still have when they’ve suffered devastating loss. There is a lot of loss around me right now with the California fires in my back yard, but people are saying, “We’re still alive. My family is safe.” Being grateful helps us to focus on what is important–the people we love–not the stuff that is replaceable. And acknowledgement of our gratitude for their survival makes us strong and affirms our values.
We think of grace as an adjective to describe the way someone moves, like a dancer, with poise and surety. But it’s a magical characteristic with the larger meaning of bestowing love and blessings. Grace defines how you live each day and along with gratitude and generosity helps you live your life’s purpose. This is the most important gift and powerfully shapes every relationship you develop. When you develop grace, you’re acting from your heart without judgment or requirements to earn your love. We accept what makes us different and honor those attributes that help us lift each other up in support of one another.
It’s exciting to spend time with like-minded women who share and support one another with generous kindness for their unique gifts. I recently attended Take the Lead Day in New York City. If you weren’t able to attend, you can watch videos from the event here. At the end of the day, everyone was so excited and charged with energy that we didn’t want it to end. The feeling of so many women feeling positive about themselves, the message and their future of having the power to achieve parity and take their place as leaders in our businesses, communities, and to make a difference in the world is indescribable. But it brought home to me why we need to support one another and try to create that feeling each and every day.
I wish that feeling for you, not just through this holiday, but into next year and the many years ahead. Reach out to your sisters with generosity and feel grateful for all your gifts. Bestow gifts on yourself as you care and honor yourself. You matter and are a powerful woman who has the ability to share your gifts with others. Pass it on, so that we can all experience what it means to live in and with grace.

Reaching Out to Help Women Like Us

Linda Rendleman, Author, Speaker, Philanthropist

Linda Rendleman


Fueled by a heart that is definitely big enough to change the world, writer, speaker and philanthropist Linda Rendleman has always worked to lift women up. In 2012 when the Super Bowl came to Indianapolis, Linda learned that the epidemic of sexual trafficking was not a world away, but in her own backyard. That knowledge appalled her and drove her to act. This year, her foundation, Women Like Us, Inc. is raising $25,000 through crowdfunding to fight sexual trafficking where it lives—in your town and on the streets around  the world.
In this conversation, Linda reveals that the market for sex relies on supply and demand and crosses all socio-economic boundaries. Children (girls and boys) are taken at the ages of 10-15 and sold into slavery. Once there, they find themselves in a lifestyle where they are victimized three ways: by the pimps who own them, the customers who use them and the police who arrest them for breaking the law. But there is a way out and many organizations are working hard to help free the victims of this horrifying industry.

The Key is Awareness

Linda admits that she was clueless in thinking that sex trafficking was the problem of 3rd world countries and poverty and drugs. As she rode along with a woman working to rescue kids, she saw everything from a top-of-the-line Mercedes to older cars amid the traffic shopping for sex. The real problem is with the user. They pay more for younger bodies and that’s when the victims are the most vulnerable. One attorney Linda spoke with said that she had never met a prostitute who hadn’t been sexually abused as a child or trafficked. Linda’s goal now is to create awareness of the problem and develop volunteers and funds to fight it head on.
Her most recent book, WOMEN LIKE US Together Changing the World contains a section with stories written by women who have found their mission fighting sex trafficking in different ways. One of these women is Washington State Congresswoman Linda Smith. She created Shared Hope International when she visited Mumbai to see the human trafficking problem for herself.  When she became aware that the industry was the second most profitable in the world and stretched into her own back yard, she vowed to  fight the laws that makes criminals of victimized American children, and today  rates the states on her website. Linda was shocked to find that California gets a D on Shared Hope’s state grade card.

Rescue, Restore and Recover

The organizations work with the victims through a three-part process. First, they rescue them from the streets or houses where they work. They house them through mentoring, social work and psychiatric process, then finally help them into recovery. There are many success stories where women are getting degrees, working to retrieve their children from the foster system and moving on to have happy, healthy lives.
Linda’s organization supports many  organizations that  are working daily to lift other women up, one woman at a time. She produced a documentary to tell the story and show the viewer what it’s like to ride along with those who are reaching out to help. Check out her website for more. Add your own donation to help her reach her goal of transforming lives. And listen to this conversation for more of Linda’s story and how Dr. Nancy says we must all work together to end this crime against the most vulnerable of us. And we can end it—together.

Human Slavery Makes Me Angry

By Dr. Nancy O’Reilly

It’s time for all of us to wake up and come together to end the worst of our society’s crimes against human beings. I’m talking about sex trafficking. In my conversation with Linda Rendleman, founder of Women Like Us foundation and one of my amazing Leading Women Co-authors, I was shocked to find out the sheer numbers of children here in the United States and world-wide who become victims of this horrendous crime every single year.
1.2 million girls and boys are trafficked every year. Sex trafficking is the second most profitable business in the world, taking in over a billion dollars in business every year.
This problem is at the core of our society and needs ALL of us to step up to end it. This is not a woman’s issue; it’s a human issue. It’s estimated that 30% of the children who are trafficked are boys, but that figure is probably low. Approximately 99% of the users (those who pay to have sex with these children) are men. We must all be outraged and use that anger to really make a difference.
All of us can do something. Click here to access Women Like Us crowd funding page. This campaign is working to raise money to help the women’s organizations rescue children from the streets, house them in safe places and help them become valued members of society. Any small amount will help, especially if we all help. The organizations cannot be sustainable and continue their important work without help. The need us; they need YOU in whatever small way you can contribute.

Want to report sex traffficking? Need to call for help? National Hotline is 1-888-373-7888

Each generation of children who are stolen and sold in the streets creates a new generation of prostitutes. Our children believe what they are told. If they lack self-esteem because they are not empowered with positive language and told they are amazing and can do amazing things, they look for it in potentially harmful places—online in relationships that are false and manipulative, in older boys who profess romantic love to trap immature girls into doing what they want, and with others who only want to entrap and abuse them. We must reach out to protect them with positive environments and a belief in their own precious value as free, self-reliant young women and men.

Waiting For You To Notice from Shared Hope on Vimeo.

Our judicial system makes these vulnerable victims criminals and punishes them rather than the men who pay to use them and the pimps who stole them away in the first place. We must work from both ends of the problem. Linda Smith founded Shared Hope International after being introduced to sex trafficking in India, then finding out that it was so prevalent in the United States. Most shocking is that the primary victims in our country are middle-class middle school kids. And the younger the children, the more the men will pay.  Linda’s organization is working on the judicial system in every state and recruiting men to come forward in the fight and recruit others to get everyone involved in, not only legislating for and rescuing victims, but eradicating the unhealthy demand for sex with children.
I am convinced that every person we help, helps three more people. Imagine if each of us helps just one of these victims, how that will spread to make a difference in the world. Every person only wants to be loved. Reach out with your love to help end this cycle of modern-day slavery today. It is at the heart of social justice in our world and will do more for raising us all up than any other single action you can take. Help Women Like Us exceed their funding goal and support these organizations working every day to free a new generation of children.

When We’re Bullied We’re All Children

stressed bullying victim
Have you noticed that when we find ourselves in the crosshairs of slights, snubs or outright attacks, we suddenly feel small and vulnerable? Our typical instinct is to go hide somewhere—like under the bed.  While that may be a child’s response, full grown women and men can come under attack from a bully at a moment’s notice. Why is that behavior so common and what makes people of any gender or age turn to bullying others?
Bullies aren’t evil, according to “5 Ways to Help Children Deal with Bullies Compassionately” from Fractus Learning. Bullies are unhappy. Bullying indicates inner turmoil. The author behind the info graphic, psychologist Chiu Lau, says that there are many reasons people behave badly. One reason is that they may feel bad about themselves, so by making others feel bad, they feel better. Some people learn that being mean to someone is a way to get what they want. Others bully because they have been bullied, so they try to protect themselves by scaring others. The list continues, but the point is there isn’t one simple answer. In general, the bully lacks something and perceives he or she will gain from acting badly. So how can children (and adults) deal effectively with bullies?
There’s a lot of advice about this. One is to understand that it may not be about you, unless you’re standing in the way of the bully’s pursuit of a coveted job, love interest, or other perceived desire. Even if the bully wants power over you, it’s still not about YOU; it’s about how it makes the bully feel. Some just want to win and feeling power over another person makes them feel powerful. But fighting back only adds fuel to the bully’s fire. Anger and aggression beget more anger and aggression. Running away also is not a positive option unless you’re in physical danger. Then it’s the best option.
Although it’s an unpleasant situation, maybe you should actually thank the workplace bully for giving you a chance to grow, suggests Marlene Chism, author of Stop Workplace Drama.  She says it gives you an opportunity to examine your personal boundaries and figure out what you’re willing to accept from another person and also why you’re avoiding confrontation. Most important, Marlene recommends that you take this opportunity to reinvent and realign. If you see yourself as a weak victim, you definitely need to change your perspective and invent a new YOU who is a powerful creator. She advises changing your communication style starting with how you communicate to yourself.
However, if you feel personal danger, you should immediately seek help. Tell someone you trust, suggests Fractus Learning. In a child’s case, it could be a favorite teacher or parent. Whoever you tell, remember there is power in sharing your stories. If a bully is bearing down hard and you fear for your job, your safety or even your life, don’t try to handle it alone. Even if you don’t have a trusted person you think might help, explaining your situation to someone else will help you understand your own feelings so you can get some perspective on the situation. Leading Women co-author, Bridget Cook-Burch talks about how changing the story you tell yourself can transform your life. In the situation she describes in her chapter in the book, she feared for her loss of livelihood when a client began to harass her. Sometimes, the threat can seem so severe that we can’t see a way out and try to avoid or ignore it. But this kind of fear only compounds itself if it’s allowed to fester inside. Bridget’s powerful story tells how to overcome the fear to reinvent and realign your life, much as Marlene suggests.
Elaborate studies have been performed to determine if bullying is cultural or inherited. Bullying not only crosses cultures and time periods, it also crosses species, according to Hogan Sherro, who analyzed it for Scientific American. Therefore, he concluded that it must be a human trait––part of the human condition–– which is used to intimidate and control the balance of power in social situations. In fact, some companies develop an entire culture based on bullying, according to Bullying Statistics. This develops because management doesn’t admit to or deal with underlying problems. The same article lists the unproductive outcomes from bullying, including stress, high turnover, absenteeism, loss of motivation, etc., all of which can result in a costly impact on the bottom line. The author urges victims to document the bullying behavior and report it to management. “Companies with good anti-bullying policies usually hold meetings from time to time to remind employees what workplace bullying is, how to report it, and the consequences for bullying,” she writes.
Whatever the social situation, it’s important to name the behavior accurately. Identifying bullying, whether it’s on Facebook, in the classroom or at work, is the first step. Then, advises Fractus Learning, treat the bully with compassion. If you’re strong enough to come out from under the bed, invent your own story and become a powerful creator, this might indeed work. The bully is unhappy and feels powerless. When you’re sincerely kind to people, they feel valued. Being an example of kindness may be difficult in the face of someone telling you that you’re ugly, but that’s what Chiu Lau (and Mother Teresa) recommend.
If kindness was simple, then everyone would be kind and no one would experience meanness and bullying,” writes Susan Swearer, Co-Director of the Bullying Research Network. She challenges us to imagine a world where kindness is the norm and then create it by teaching, modeling and rewarding kindness. Punishing bullying behavior doesn’t work. Instead, she says, “it makes better sense to focus on teaching and modeling pro-social behavior, like teaching kindness.” Pro-social behaviors include being respectful, creating gratitude activities, volunteering and giving service, and fostering working together. She outlines this teaching plan with the intention of presenting it to children.
But imagine if we grownups did the same thing in our workplaces. Suppose we encourage each other to help out when one of our workmates seems stressed or overwhelmed. What if we hold employee meetings to brainstorm ways we can reward one another for good work, support each other’s ideas, and even-out the workload? Apply that same model to any social situation—committee, community event, city council, or foundation—kindness begets kindness and toxic relationships cannot thrive in its midst. It’s not easy to always be kind when you’re under pressure, and it may be impossible in a heated moment with a bully bearing down on your neck, but it feels a lot more satisfying and rewarding when you achieve it. And when you practice it on a daily basis, thrown in with a dose of gratitude every day, you diffuse the power of any potential bully by setting out the best example of the human condition. Yes, there are just as many studies that report kindness is also part of the human condition. And these random acts also span centuries and species, just as bullying does.
Kindness is actually intuitive, reports Melissa Dahl. It’s only when we think it over, that we become selfish.  She cites studies where college students’ first inclination is to share, not hoard, and heroic acts where people risk their own lives in a matter of seconds to save the life of a stranger. Overwhelming evidence of everyday heroes blazes across the front pages of every crisis. In each case, people reach out to help a neighbor they may never have met, possibly one who shook a fist at them in traffic. So kindness is a matter of choice. YOU can choose how to react to bullying behavior. You can focus on resenting the bully or YOU can try to help a powerless person to get beyond their feelings of loss. Even though it may take practice, remember that your first instinct as a human being is to be kind.

Leadership Lessons from Horses

Executive Coach, Author

Evelyn McKelvie


The transformation of her life and career as took place during her first experience with a horse, recalls Evelyn McKelvie, Executive Coach, author and founder of Equine Coach. She describes its effect on her as both physical and spiritual, to the degree that she felt her emotional body had been given a deep tissue massage. At the time she was working in Information Technology, which she calls a knowledge-based abstract intellectual pursuit, while learning all she could about horses and searching for a trainer. She found her perfect trainer in western Canada, named Chris Irwin, who opened her eyes to the secret world of horses, their language and the way they behave with each other. Erwin taught her how to communicate with horses so they understand her.
Evelyn began comparing the socialization of horses to that of humans in the workplace. Both species are mammals that perceive the world in terms of threats or safety. In fact, technology has recently shown that people react to potential threats much faster than possible rewards. Horses also perceive threats most of the time, but because of the difference in their brains and social patterns, their response is much different. In fact, the stability of the herd lies with everyone knowing their roles in the hierarchy and behaving within those roles.

First Respect, Then Trust, Finally Love.

Evelyn wrote a book about her experience and how she incorporates it into coaching called, The Executive Horse: 21st Century Leadership Lessons from Horses. She Executive Horse Book Coversays that the idea of the stallion as the leader came from the Victorians and is not how the herd actually works. The lead mare is acknowledged by the herd when she has proven that she can care for the herd and keep it safe. Horses don’t love until they know they can trust you. She describes the stallion as the doorman or bouncer who keeps other stallions from mating with the mares. But the leader is chosen by and earns her place within the herd. If humans chose their workplace leaders in the same way — based on behavior and character, instead of by power or money — Evelyn says our workplace leadership would be much more authentic, and our work more productive and positive.

Awareness of the Present Moment

Both Evelyn and Dr. Nancy talk about how you have to remain in the present when working with horses. Dr. Nancy laughs about what happens if you let your attention stray. Because of horses’ size and strength, self-awareness becomes absolutely imperative. Evelyn became comfortable with living in the now while riding. This present-focus kept her acutely aware of the interaction dynamic and how she could create a greater sense of ease and calm with the horse. If we would apply that to other humans, our relationships would be much more rewarding for both parties.
Evelyn invites everyone to check out her website. She has a 7-minute self-assessment there that only takes around seven minutes called “The 8-Fold Path of Equis,” which is based on the principles from her horse trainer. She also has a blog and offers to sign her book if you order it from her website. Also attend her monthly webinar in which she interviews women leaders with executive coach Carrie Galant at “Alpha Mare Leadership.
Be sure to listen to this interview for more comparisons and contrasts from Dr. Nancy and Evelyn between horses and humans. Learn how very much they have to teach us about creating relationships that work.

Say Yes and Find Your Destiny for Good

The Profit Accellerator

Allyson Bird


Founder of Money Movers International, LLC, Allyson Byrd, echoes Mother Teresa’s advice, “Say yes” and be open to possibilities; use your gifts and talents to create a world you can love and enjoy, where you can thrive in goodness and where miracles rise to meet you over and over again. Nothing is too big or too impossible for Allyson Byrd. She is known as The Profit Accelerator, because that is exactly what she does for clients.  In the past 18 months, Allyson and her team have coached over 485 entrepreneurial leaders to create over 16.9 million dollars in NEW revenue.

Reason for Success is Love

Allyson says that every statistic would have charted her to fail in life. A black girl in the South, raised by a single mother, dropped out of school at 15, and whose last image of her father at the age of four was in handcuffs as they put him in prison. When she looks around at the life she is living now, she says that all they had was love. It was the one constant in her life. She didn’t know how to make money, save money, or grow money. Attaining wealth was unimaginable.
The etymological root of love is to believe and find value. Through her reading and her work, Allyson learned to find value in purpose and began the business, The Purpose Within, to help people find value in their work. Allyson says that 66% of people in our society feel invisible, undervalued, unnecessary and like their voice isn’t being heard. After that basic beginning, she moved on to helping people become tremendous leaders in their field. She helps them amplify their voices, many on a global scale.

Money is a Tool to Make Things Better

Allyson and Dr. Nancy agree that women have issues getting  past the “money thing.” Allyson says 80% of her audience are women leaders who haven’t figured out how to be brave enough to be paid handsomely for what they do. Allyson urges people to accept the money – even if you just give it away – take it, don’t waste it. Her company has built schools in Africa, founded sports camps in third world countries, worked to stop the hunger crisis in North America, provided funding to fight human trafficking, and much more. She never knew she could create so much wealth, so she encourages everyone to be unapologetic and unleash their talents to be a power for good.

BeUnapologetic.com

Allyson hopes this year will be the year everyone says yes. Check out her website www.allysonbyrd.com and go to beunapologetic.com to find out more about how others have benefited from Allyson’s wisdom. Listen to this conversation for more insights to help women learn how empowering it is when they say yes to a life that’s high on contribution and low on fear. Then go on up to the next level and sign up for Allyson’s next Unconference wait list. Click here to pre-register.

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